Mathematics has
never been my forte. When people start talking numbers at me, my eyes glaze
over and I furiously start to scramble for a page-turner in the conversation.
But strangely
enough, numbers seem to haunt me, particularly in relation to the family unit.
People astound me
that they feel they have the right to tell you how many times you should
procreate. If I had a dollar for every time I have heard…’so when is the next one coming along…must be time to have another
baby…you can’t just have the one…’
Unless I have sought
your professional medical opinion and you are equally qualified to give it – I
see little value in these opinions, offered all to readily and unsolicited.
I have heard all the
reasons why you should never have an ‘only child’. Random people feel it is their purpose in life to warn you
against your erroneous ways: always
spoilt; can’t socialise with others; can’t share; have behavioural issues;
selfish…the list goes on.
Well, I have started
a list of my own, based on actual research, as opposed to anecdotes, personal
experience and old wives’ tales.
Only children:
- are as well adjusted as their peers with siblings
- have higher self-esteem
- have higher IQs
- have good language skills and
- are more likely to be strongly independent.
As Michael Grose
declares in his book, “Why First Borns Rule the World and Last
Borns Want to Change It”,
If
self-esteem and school achievement levels are used as a barometer of a healthy,
well-adjusted and desirable childhood then most parents would stop at one.
Nearly one in five
children are ‘only children’ and this statistic is likely to increase with the parallel
pressures of finances, career, maternal age and care.
I recently came
across this…
The English
words 'only child' might sound as if there are not enough children. The
French words for only child - 'un enfant unique' and the Italian 'un filio
unico' mean that the child is special - only one of a kind!
…which I have
adopted. Our precious little one
is most definitely an 'un enfant unique.'
Numbers never
enter the equation.
